In his epic poem “The Four Quartets,” T.S. Elliot wrote:
“We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.”
I’ve experienced the truth of this over and over again in my life. Maybe you have, too. You’re going along, doing whatever it is you’re doing, and you discover yourself in familiar territory. Maybe it’s an issue you thought you’d resolved. Maybe it’s a realization you’d had that you thought you’ve already incorporated into your life. Maybe it’s a situation you find all too familiar. Whatever it is, though, you find yourself “back where you started,” yet your experience is somehow different.
It’s different, at least, if you’ve grown. There’s a saying that inspires me: “If the you of five years ago does not find the you of today a heretic, you’re not growing spiritually.” (This is usually erroneously attributed to the prolific author and Trappist monk Fr. Thomas Merton.) This means to me that when you come again to that place you know perhaps too well, it should seem that that you “know it for the first time.” This isn’t because the situation has changed; it’s because you have.
This is the experience many people have when reading, and re-reading, a passage of scripture, or praying a traditional prayer they’ve prayed before. The words remain the same, yet your life experiences bring out something new ... in other words, you “know the place for the first time.”
Have you ever experienced this? Are you experiencing it now? This could be a fruitful area to explore with your Spiritual Director (if you have one).
Pax’s tecum,
RevWik
UPDATE: After a year of stepping away from my practice of Spiritual Direction I am once again accepting directees. If you’re interested in exploring the possibility of inviting me to journey with you, drop me a line. (There’s a link to the right.)
